Myles Garrett isn’t backing down from his claim that Steelers quarterback Mason Rudolph used a racial slur, but that wasn’t meant to go public.

The Browns defensive end, whose indefinite ban from the NFL was upheld on appeal Thursday, said he didn’t lose his temper without reason when he swung and slammed Rudolph’s helmet over the top of the quarterback’s head last Thursday. It was the result of a racial slur directed at him by Rudolph, Garrett said during his appeal hearing with the league Wednesday, ESPN reported.

This would be the first known time Garrett, who spoke after the game and offered an official apology the day after, mentioned a racial slur was used during the incident. The NFL said it found no evidence of Rudolph using the slur and Rudolph denied through his lawyer using such language.

Garrett, who will have to meet with the Commissioner’s Office before being reinstated, defended his claims after the hearing.

“I was assured that the hearing was space that afforded the opportunity to speak openly and honestly about the incident that led to my suspension,” Garrett said in a statement. “That was not meant for public dissemination, nor was it a convenient attempt to justify my actions or restore my image in the eyes of those I disappointed.”

“I know what I heard. Whether my opponent’s comment was born out of frustration or ignorance, I cannot say. But his actions do not excuse my lack of restraint in the moment, and I truly regret the impact this has had on the league, the Browns and our devoted fans.”

The Browns continued to express their support for Garrett.

“As we’ve consistently stated, our organizational support for Myles will continue,” Browns general manager John Dorsey said in a statement. “He is a man of high character and unquestionable integrity. He was open and honest with us about the incident from the start. He has taken accountability for his actions on Thursday night and this situation will not define him.”

Dorsey’s backing came after Garrett’s Brown teammates weren’t able to corroborate the defensive lineman’s claims about Rudolph using a racial slur. An ESPN reporter described Browns quarterback Baker Mayfield as “pretty stunned” by the accusation and receiver Jarvis Landry said he hadn’t heard anything about the alleged use of a slur. Safety Damarious Randall hadn’t heard about the slur either, but did say he “figured there was a lot more to the story.”